162 Developing a narrative: Pitch ideas

We have been assigned a task, by either of the following this start-up lines:

A: There is a hammering on a door, it opens to reveal a dishevelled breathless person, why? How did they get this way…

B: There is a hammering on a door, why? Dare the door be opened? If so what is revealed….

These premises sparked a few initial ideas for me, here are three pitches ideas:

Pitch Number One: 

There is a knock at the door, Dan becomes immediately panicked. His agoraphobia is getting slowly better through counselling but this unplanned announcement has sent him spiralling into a frenzy of unwanted fear and worry. The knocking continues, Dan is trying to pull up the inner strength to open the door, but can he get over his phobia to find what lies on the other side of the door.

Pitch Number Two:

There is a hammering on the door, Tommy opens it to find his best friend (who is also the love of his life) looking traumatised, she is unresponsive but sits down inside his flat. He tries to bring her round but she is completely void of emotion, depersonalised. Tommy reflects on their close relationship, and eventually Evie states that her husband has left her…unfortunately, she did not simply let him leave.

Pitch Number Three: 

There is a hammering on the door. Jeff  opens it to a crazed gunman who crashes past him, trashes his apartment and begins taking his television and valuables. Jeff jumps at the robber, attempting to stop him from taking his things, the robber shoots Jeff in the shoulder, and takes off with a bag of small valuables and Jeff’s 20 inch TV. Jeff wakes up the next morning, he rushes to the phone and calls the police, as he is explaining the event he looks around to find his flat untouched, and no injury to his shoulder.
The next night there is another knock at the door, there is a small group of friends who state Jeff had invited them round, but he does not remember, and does not entirely recall his own identity, in a dreamlike state of anxiety and confusion we find that Jeff is suffering from a dissociative disorder.

Personally I think pitch two may be the best pitch to carry forward and develop, I believe I can create a solid premise for this and make an interesting script from it.


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